


Memories of Another Life

by Dooiney_Oie



Series: Memories Long Buried [1]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Gen, M/M, Post-Canon, Some violence & other unpleasantries but nothing extreme, The taakitz is there but it's not really the focus here, This is like 90 percent dialogue lmao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-05
Updated: 2017-10-05
Packaged: 2018-12-24 10:46:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12011109
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dooiney_Oie/pseuds/Dooiney_Oie
Summary: Kravitz talks to Taako about what he remembers from when he was alive. It's a process.AKA me going into extensive detail about a potential backstory for Kravitz.





	Memories of Another Life

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't expect this to turn into a 4k monster when I started it but here we are. I just really love Kravitz

  
"Hey, Krav?"

"Yeah?"

"You used to be like, alive, right? Like you were a real flesh boy with a heartbeat 'n' shit?"

They're lying across the enormous bed in Taako's new home in the dim evening light, bodies parallel with their heads next to the other person's feet. It's been a long day, moving all of his stuff over from the bureau and decorating the place.

"Alive? I think so. I don't really remember a whole lot about it."

"But you remember some things?"

"I mean, a little. It all happened so long ago." Kravitz frowns. "And I think I blocked some of it out. It's all kind of blurry."

"Like, static blurry? Voidfish kinda thing? I thought that was all done with now."

"Not like that. That stuff never worked on me anyway, remember? Just... blurry. Y'know, old."

"Would you tell me about it?"

"Why? It's not like you can meet my parents or anything, they've been dead for centuries."

"I dunno, just like, you've heard my life story, right? About me 'n' Lup, and all the years we were on the starblaster, all that shit. But I don't know squat about your life."

"Oh. I guess you're right." He stares into the middle distance. "It's not very coherent, though."

"You don't have to. I was just curious."

"No, it's fair. I think... hm. Give me a minute."

"Take your time, my man, I've got all night."

There's a long pause while Kravitz tries to sift through memories buried so deep they've grown roots. Prying them loose is an effort, and the time they cover is patchy.

"I think I was alive... a dozen or so centuries ago? I'm not sure. Time is... weird, when you've existed so long, and hop in and out of the astral plane so much."

"And you don't look a day over 800." He feels an elbow nudge against his ribs playfully. "Still, that's a pretty long time ago."

"Yeah. I don't think things were incredibly different, though. Except, the Millers & some others made a lot of advancements in this world relatively recently - I don't remember any elevators. Or trains, or anything like those battlewagons you told me about. Just horses, maybe a carriage." He frowns. "I think my family had one. Not many people did. It had leather seats."

"Oohh, handsome and rich? I sure know how to pick 'em."

"I... maybe. There were a lot of - a lot of fancy clothes."

"I mean, you still dress pretty sharp, bones."

"Those are... different. I was never allowed to dress like that. My parents..."

"Clearly had no taste. I mean, no offense."

"No, you don't have to apologise. I think... I think I hated them?"

"Well, that makes two of us. They sound like jerks."

"Nnhm."

Another pause. Kravitz keeps trying to pry more memories loose, but they feel... reluctant. Like something's keeping them tied down.

"I think they wanted to marry me off. Something about raising the status of the family. Some prince, I was supposed to..."

"What, you were supposed to be some kind of trophy husband?"

"Not a trophy husband. A queen."

"Wow. Shit."

"Real cliché, right?"

"Doesn't mean it didn't suck."

"Yeah. I- I think I ran away."

"He was that bad?"

Kravitz's expression darkens. "The worst. He was cruel, and selfish, and he had a horrible temper. I only met him once, but I hated him completely and immediately."

"Can't blame you for running away, then. How'd you do it?"

"I took one of the horses... no. I tried to take one, but, there were guards. Lots."

"Holy moly, homes, you must've been hot shit."

"I was a flight risk. Not allowed outside the house most of the time."

"Fuck. Sounds lonely."

"It was. There was one person though, I think." A flash of colour in the darkness.

"Secret lover?"

"Ha. No. I was a little young for that. They let me have music lessons."

"Oh yeah, the whole conductor thing. You said you wanted to be one."

"Yes, I loved music. My teacher was this kind old woman. Gnomish. I could talk to her about anything, and she never ratted me out."

"Sounds like a good gal."

"Yeah." He grins. "Never gave a shit about what other people thought of her. She was kinda like you."

"Sweet. Definitely a good gal then."

"Those lessons were the best part of my life. They let me escape."

"Like, literally? Or like you just got to put your head out to pasture for a while?"

The colour flashes again. It's bright and prismatic.

"... I think both. Eventually."

"Shit, you managed to get away?"

"Yeah! It was... towards the end of one of our lessons, and I was playing.... something... and the guard outside the door suddenly fell asleep."

"Magic?"

Kravitz nods. "Mmhm. Bardic magic. It was an accident."

"That's pretty impressive."

"My teacher... ugh." Frustratingly, the names seem to have faded the most with time. "I can't remember her name. But, she taught me how to control it, make it stronger, until I could use it properly. And she kept it a secret."

"She was a bard, too?"

"She couldn't do any magic herself, or I think she would've helped me sooner. But she covered up the times I slipped and miscast, brought me books, taught me the theory. Until I got strong enough to escape by myself."

"Man, we gotta see if we can't find this gal's grave, make her a fuckin' saint. Or at least leave some flowers."

There's a glimmer of a feeling there that vanishes as soon as it appears. "That'd be nice."

"You remember what happened next? If you wanna keep going, I mean. Shit's pretty heavy."

"No, no, it feels good to tell someone about it. And, the more I talk, the clearer it gets."

The memories are bobbing to the surface one after another, now, like bubbles of air being dislodged from a riverbed. But as he examines the feeling, it stops, the river freezing over.

"As long as you're sure. Tell me about your great escape, then, music man."

"Hmm. It's gone all foggy again. Give me a minute."

He tracks through the memories he's already pulled free, trying to find a thread to pull.

"Oh! The horse!"

"Midnight ride?"

"Yeah, um, we made a plan, me and my teacher, for one of the days when we knew there'd be less people around. I think it was a solstice festival - it got dark really early, and most of the servants had the day off."

"The nobility thing is still weird. I can imagine you ordering servants around, though."

"Why's that?"

"You got that whole 'regal air' thing going."

"Huh."

"Like, in a nice way, though. Like people'd trust you to lead 'em into battle or some shit."

"I think that came with the years of service as a bounty hunter. I don't remember being a very confident person when I was alive without an instrument in my hand."

"Interesting. Guess that makes sense. Sorry for interrupting, keep going."

"Oh, right." He picks up the loose thread again. "Solstice festival... it was quiet. I had a lesson late in the day, and my teacher brought me some travelling supplies, a small lute I could keep on my belt, and some new clothes."

"Clothes?"

"Like I said, all mine were really fancy, fit for nobility. I would've stuck out anywhere I went in those. Plus, it's hard to ride a horse in a dress, especially in the dark."

"Makes sense."

"I charmed one of the guards to take me out to the stables and get the horse ready, and put all the others to sleep on the way. Then I rode as fast and as far away as I could. Fell into a ditch at the side of the road and broke my ankle when the horse spooked at something a few dozen miles from the estate, and ended up lying there alone for a day or so until someone came along and found me. Gods, I was lucky."

"Your teacher didn't come with you?"

A small head shake. "No. She was a very old woman. She said bringing her along would only slow me down." He frowns as the thread he'd been following suddenly vanishes into darkness. Odd. "I never found out what happened to her."

"Shit. That's rough."

"I always hoped she made it away somewhere. But..."

"She was in that much danger, just for helping you?"

"Others were executed for less."

"Fuck, dude. And you, what, just kept running?"

He nods, picking up a new trail. "For a decade, at least. It was a long time. Actually-"

He snorts suddenly, doubling over as he shakes with laughter. He tries to continue, but can't get the words out between fits of giggles.

Taako looks at him like he's not sure whether to be concerned or join in. "You okay, there, babe? Correct me if I'm wrong, but that didn't seem like a funny story to me."

"It isn't, just," he's still laughing, tears in his eyes, "I actually had a bounty put on my head. It's really ironic, now that I think about it."

"Oh my gods, you were a fugitive? You fuckin' hypocrite!" Taako starts giggling now, too. "Any dashing bounty hunters come sweep you off your feet? Or vice versa?"

"Not that I remember." The bursts of laughter ebb away as he tries to concentrate again. "I don't think any ever found me. The bounty was on my old name, my old life. That person didn't exist any more, so there was little chance of my being caught."

"So then what? Do some adventuring? Fame and fortune? Start a family?"

"I think I just travelled, played my music. It was nice to not be trapped in one place. I liked the freedom."

"Guess that's one way of looking at it."

"Mmhm. I made some good friends. Some closer than friends. Almost got married once, I think, but it didn't work out."

"So... how'd that all end? I mean, you're not all wrinkly 'n' old, does that mean this" - Taako gestures towards him - "is the age you died at?"

"Not necessarily. Spirits usually appear in whatever form is most comfortable for them, there's no reason I'd be any different. I don't think it's exactly the same as my living body, but as for the age... I don't know."

"Hm. A fun little mystery." Taako yawns. "Actually, it's pretty late, and dying's probably a really shitty memory, forget I said anything."

"No, it's fine, but...." A frown creeps back onto Kravitz' face. The steady flow of memories has suddenly vanished into darkness again. "I actually don't remember."

"Nothing?"

"Nope. It's all blank."

"Weird."

"Yeah."

"You think that's deliberate? Like, you blocked it out or something?"

"I don't know. I remember the years I moved around and played various settlements, but at some point it just... stops. The next thing I remember is after I died, when the Raven Queen made me a deal to become her hand. I think that means I died before I was supposed to. There was still destiny I had yet to fulfill." He turns and flashes a smile. "Or maybe people I was supposed to meet."

"I can't believe you just turned your own death into a pickup line." Taako giggles. "Still, maybe it's better you don't remember. Some memories'll knock you on your ass. And, as someone intimately familiar with the whole dying shtick, I can tell you it's not too pleasant."

Kravitz lets out a dry laugh. "Ha. Maybe you should've tried dying less, then, make my job easier."

"And not have your handsome face come after me? I'd say it was worth it." Taako reaches down so that their hands are touching, linking up their fingers.

"Now who's turning death into a pickup line?" Kravitz laughs, but squeezes the soft skin pressed against his own. The dark patch in his memory worries him. He scratches at its edges - he just needs to find a loose corner to pull at.

"I can't let you have all the fun, reaper boy. Still, that's a pretty extreme story. You should write a book. Bet it'd be a bestseller."

Kravitz sits bolt upright. "I did."

"What?"

The darkness unravels like a worn blanket. "I did write - not a book. Something else. Music. I wrote a show. It was famous." He swallows. Suddenly it's hard to breathe. "She was there."

Taako sits up now, too, places a gentle hand on his arm. "Who? Babe, are you okay? You're shaking."

"My teacher. When I died."

"I thought you didn't remember?"

"I didn't. I never tried to remember before, I didn't need to - I didn't _want_ to."

"Shit, this is my fault, me 'n' my big fuckin' mouth - listen, let's just go to sleep, okay? Don't push it any farther."

Kravitz shakes his head. "No, I've gotta - I've gotta finish the story." He takes a deep breath even though he doesn't need it, lets it out again. It's steadying. "I want to know."

"Are you sure that's a good idea? You seem pretty shaken up about it."

"I can't stop now. I have to know - the Raven Queen, She did this, blocked these memories out until I was ready to face them."

"Alright, then. Just, don't force it, okay? Memories can feel like bricks when they all hit you at once, I know that too well."

Taako turns and makes his way up to the top of the bed, sitting back against the cushions. He pats the space next to him. Kravitz follows his lead and moves up so they're next to each other again. He closes his eyes and rests his head in the elf's lap as warm fingers start playing with his hair.

"So your teacher wasn't dead after all?"

"No... that might've been better. They-" He feels his fists clench. "After I escaped, they didn't kill her. They- _fuck_."

"Still pretty bad, then."

"They branded her a traitor to the kingdom, sold her into slavery. Horrible things like that still happened in the open back then. All those years I was enjoying my freedom, and she was in chains."

"That's not your fault."

"Isn't it?"

"No, dummy. She chose to help you, she had to have known the consequences."

"Still." His hands worry at the fine embroidery on the bedspread. "One night, I came up to take my bows at the end of the show, and I saw her. Right next to the stage, in one of the private boxes. She was sat behind some rich-looking woman." He swallows. "She was in an awful state. But even through all the scars and wounds and muck, she still looked proud of me. I almost fainted right there under the lights, pleaded a dizzy spell and ran to go find her, but by the time I made it to the box, she was gone. As was her owner."

"Shit."

"I don't think her master realised who I was. Or if she did, she didn't act on it. It took me weeks to track them down; only having a couple of vague descriptions meant a whole lot of legwork and charm spells to get information."

"That's some pretty solid detective work, bones, you'd make Agnes proud."

He chuckles. "Thanks. But, she'd already sold her on by the time I found her, to some group of wizards to the south. She'd lost the ability to play the music she'd been bought for after all the beatings her hands had taken over the years, so as far as her mistress was concerned, she was useless. Claimed _false advertising."_ His voice drips with rage as he remembers those words. "It was infuriating."

"It's some hot bullshit, is what it is."

"I left the show to run itself while I travelled south." (Never came back, a part of him whispers.) "It took weeks, again, before I found the group that bought her. They weren't what I was expecting." He closes his eyes, forehead tense. "I wasn't prepared."

"What do you mean?"

"They weren't wizards. Or rather, they were, but a very particular kind." His nails scrape against the fabric of the sheets. "Necromancers."

" _Fuck_."

"Yeah." Kravitz turns to meet Taako's eyes, his expression tight and pained. "Do you know the process for becoming a lich, Taako? Not the one your sister and her fiancé created, the traditional one."

Taako shudders, remembering black lightning on a hilltop. "No."

Kravitz turns back, starts picking at threads on the sheets again. "It's pure evil. As if lichdom wasn't enough of an affront to nature as is - ah, no offense."

"I'll let it slide."

"Even discounting that, the ritual is dark, dark magic. Among other things - horrible, awful things - it requires the sacrifice of two souls, of the same race as the one who is becoming a lich. One half their age, and one twice it."

"Holy shit," Taako breathes.

Kravitz nods. "I found them hiding out in a cave to the west of a small fishing village." He laughs bitterly. "It's always a fucking cave with these people. Caves, basements, cellars. Dark places for dark deeds, I suppose."

"Gods, Krav. I'm sorry."

"I'm used to it by now. But, at the time..." A tremor runs through him. "I was so scared. Every fibre of my soul wanted me to turn and run and never look back."

"But you didn't."

"No. I couldn't leave her."

"That's some bravery."

"It was guilt. But thank you." He sighs. "It was also stupid. Me, a lone bard, against a whole cult of necromancers? Idiocy. I wasn't thinking."

"Bet you could take 'em all on now."

"Ha. I probably could, now. But not then."

"So what, you charged in, lute at the ready?"

"Okay, I was stupid, but not _that_ stupid. I had enough sense to sneak in, dispel the warding charms around the entrance."

"Rogue style."

"Not that smooth, but good enough. They were all focused on something else when I snuck in. A ritual. I was too late to stop them." Kravitz turns his face towards the ceiling. His eyes are looking at a scene from centuries before. "They cut her throat as I watched. It was sickening. There was another next to her, much younger. Their blood was mixing on the floor."

"I'm so sorry, Krav. That must've been horrible."

"I... kind of lost control. I was so heartbroken, so _furious_. I ran in without thinking, and I, I smashed the phylactery as the necromancer was still channelling his soul into it. It exploded." His eyes go wide. "The wave of pure energy it released killed everyone inside."

"Including you?"

"Especially me. That amount of power was enough to end my life several times over."

"Wow. That's pretty heroic. No wonder the Raven Queen offered you a job killing liches for eternity."

"I think she was impressed. Or she took pity, I'm not sure. Her Majesty is pretty close to unfathomable. Either way, she saw something in me that she thought she could use, and protected me from those memories for all these years, until I was ready to remember."

"So this was when you felt ready? Talking to me? Man, I should drop the chef thing and become a therapist!" Taako slaps his arm playfully. "How 'bout it? You gonna endorse me?"

Kravitz grabs his hand, brings it to his mouth so he can kiss the elf's stove-burnt fingers. "Don't give yourself too much credit!" he laughs. "I think I just needed a push. But... yeah, I did feel ready. It just kind of felt like the right time. I feel like I can tell you anything, you know that?"

"Gods save me, you're so fuckin sappy."

"Maybe so. But all those centuries, I never had a friend, or anyone, really. I rarely had cause to talk to anyone at all. When I met your group, it was the first conversation I'd had with a living person in years."

"And then I threatened to tentacle your dick."

They both giggle for a while at that, like children. Kravitz wipes tears from his eyes. "And shoved a crystal bomb in your mouth. I couldn't remember ever being introduced to someone so outlandishly - you really threw me for a loop."

"It's kind of my specialty."

"No kidding. It was a shame to kill you after that, I wanted to find out more."

"That's pretty cheesy. You getting at some soulmate shit?"

"I don't know. Maybe some part of me sensed you were what I needed. Bounty or not."

"Hmm. I can roll with that. You're still a sap, though."

"And you have a bad attitude." He leans up and kisses him, gently. "But I love you."

"...I love you, too. Now shut up and go to sleep."

"You know I don't need sleep."

"Neither do I, but a few hours' snooze never did me any harm."

"Alright. Sleep it is. Do you want me to move?"

"Nah, you're good there. Just try not to go all ice cube in the middle of the night and freeze me to death, 'kay?"

A quiet laugh. "I'll try."

"Night, reaper boy."

"...Goodnight, my love."

 

"...Krav?"

"I thought we were sleeping!"

"We're gonna! But first, do you remember any of the songs you wrote?"

"A few, I think. Why?"

"Will you sing one for me?"

"Hm. They were written for instruments, an orchestra, but... I can give it a shot."

He thinks for a second, then starts to hum a gentle melody that rises and falls like a bird in flight. It's not a perfect adaptation, but it carries the hope and joy he wrote into it even in this raw state. When he's finished, they sit in silence for a while.

"That was incredible. I reckon you'd've given Johann a run for his money."

"It was one of the first songs I wrote. Don't remember the name."

"Well, names are tricky. Does it need one?"

"No, I guess not. I wrote it for the birds that used to visit my window when I was stuck inside. They didn't have names."

Taako groans. "Don't tell me. Ravens."

Kravitz looks at him. "How did you know?"

"Lucky fuckin' guess." He mutters. Then, under his breath, "Guess gods really don't have anything better to do than mess with people."

"You think the Raven Queen sent those birds?"

"I dunno, maybe. Wouldn't be the first time gods have known what people are destined for before they do. Though that's usually Istus' department."

"Hm. Well, those birds did keep me going. I thought of them as friends. They used to bring me gifts in exchange for food - scraps of bright cloth, polished metal, pine cones, the odd trinket they found. I guess if her majesty did send them it's one more thing I have to thank her for."

"Your devotion is impressive, really. Now, sleep. For reals."

"Mmhm. Goodnight."

Kravitz hasn't tried to sleep for centuries, but he falls quickly into darkness even so.  
In his dreams, he stands on a lone hill, playing his songs for a fiercely attentive audience of shining eyes and flapping wings. Every note he plays, they sing back to him in wonderful, joyous chorus, the wind carrying their voices upwards into the wide open sky.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! Another draft I'm posting before it gets deleted :)


End file.
